If you have ever been ghosted, had someone just suddenly disappear from your life for seemingly no reason, then you are aware of how annoying and heartbreaking it can be. Perhaps it was a friend who blocked your number or a potential mate that suddenly fell away. Statistics even show that 1 out of every five dates ends with ghosting. So, what contributes to this odd, sad phenomenon?
Throwaway World
Today’s society is full of disposable items. While this is in reference to the single use items in our day, the internet makes people somewhat disposable as well. The internet is a safety curtain of sorts, that allows people to detach with a few button clicks. While this is not a reason for ghosting, it does make it much easier.
Gender Polarization
There is also an increasing divide between genders in current culture, though this is not true everywhere. Some men are conditioned to become “tough guys” and determined not to share their feelings with anyone, while others who were abused or had domineering parents may simply be unable to share. On the other side, women are encouraged to be overly independent without the need for a man. Women often flaunt power or disrespect men in a way that is unattractive to men. This keeps people from really connecting and make ghosting much easier.
Missing Courage
Both genders suffer from a fear of embarrassment. If instead of simply ghosting someone, people chose to send a message explaining what happened, closure could be had and both people could go on with life. This would take the confusion out of the situation.
Fear
Sometimes ghosting is about real fear. Breaking off a relationship can be emotional and get heated, especially if the other person does not respect the boundaries set when it ens. The best option is to o a grounding exercise and set an intention before breaking things off so you are not nervous, then tell them it is over.
If You Have Been Ghosted
If you have been ghosted, it can be tough, even if you know some of the common reasons as to why it happens. Try the following to move past the ghosting experience.
- Self Love and Care – Make sure you are taking care of yourself during this time. Try journaling, meditation, and self-worth affirmations.
- Socialize – When you are ready, find some people to hang out with and simply have fun without expectations. Don’t force things, but do have fun.
- New Activities – Expand your horizons with new adventures with family and friends. Take a class, try a new restaurant, and see what happens.
- Take in the Universe – Connect to the universe by enjoying nature. Stare at the stars, watch a sunrise, and walk in the forest to truly connect.
Don’t let yourself fall into despair. You connected with a person so you were doing something right. Keep loving yourself and wait for good things to come.
I found the section about ‘missing courage’ quite relevant. It’s often just a matter of people not wanting to confront uncomfortable situations, which leads to ghosting.
The gender polarization aspect is intriguing, although it’s perhaps a bit oversimplified. There are many layers to why people might ghost, and societal conditioning is just one part of a complex issue.
The suggestions on how to cope with being ghosted are helpful. Activities like journaling and new adventures can indeed make a difference in healing from such experiences.
The article brings up significant points about modern dating culture. The emphasis on ‘disposability’ in today’s digital age is particularly thought-provoking. It’s concerning how easily people can detach themselves from others.
It’s true that fear plays a significant role in ghosting. The advice to set intentions and prepare before a breakup is practical and could potentially reduce the emotional strain on both parties.